Lost, But Definitely Not Dead
by Lucky9221
Summary: Gamora was lost, in a void, after the fateful sacrifice. Spoilers for Infinity Wars! Kinda Fix-It, I Guess?


She wasn't dead. She truly thought as she was hurling down the side of a cliff because her "father" actually loved her, and was then using her for the soul stone, that she would be dead. Quite the contrary in fact. She was sitting there in some form of a limbo between alive and dead. She knew how she got in the limbo, but how she was going to get the fuck out of it, she didn't know.

Her stay in the void if she could truly call it that, started out ok. Nothing really happened, so at one point she thought she was dead. But, then the visions started. All the ways she saw the people she loved suffer. This must have been what the soul stone meant by a soul for a soul. And she understood why the payment was something you loved because only a psychopath would think of this kind of hell hole as payment for another person's lust for power. When she figured out how to get out of the fucking void she vowed to kill the asshole that put her in there, especially since he had only caused her harm in her life.

The visions always started with her safe in arms of Peter. He whispers "Gamora, oh Gamora. I love you so much. So much." She always melts into his embrace, despite how much she tries to fight it. Then he kisses her forehead. Then Gamora looks up at him. She licks her lips before pressing them against his. Before she knows it, they are in a deep and breathless kiss. then all hell breaks loose, like always. Something she counts in these sick dreams, and when she was definitely alive. Most times it's Thanos that causes the hellish future in her dreams. Other times, well she'd like to forget those. Maybe this was apart of her punishment as well she thought, being eternally reminded of the man who so carelessly sacrificed her for his own gains. The man who used her as a pawn for so long until she broke, and then meet the Guardians, before they were Guardians.

As her continuously similar visions continue, she and Peter reluctantly break up the kiss and they walk to the bridge. They see all the Guardians in their proper seats, and once Peter sits down it's time to be ready for action. The location of where they are drawn to always change, but the threat is always Thanos. The team quietly disembarked the Milano, with Peter leading. They separate into two teams to flank Thanos, a simple but effective technique. Peter leads a team of Drax and Gamora, while Rocket, whom she notices has more of his life together and isn't a coward, leads Groot, Mantis, and Nebula. The two teams go in opposite directions and when Peter sees Thanos he sends a signal to Rocket. And in every scenario, this is where it goes wrong. Thanos always intercepts the signal and the fight starts premature, causing both separate groups to wing it, causing all sorts of chaos.

Sometimes she immediately flings herself at Thanos getting so close to just ending his life then, she freezes, easily getting captured in his arms. As he puts her neck in his elbow and single-handedly kills her team. It's a quick death for all of them but Peter. Thanos makes sure to take his time with him. He always makes him beg for mercy, and apologize for taking what is his, which of course was Gamora. After all her pleas, which were always ignored, Thanos finally kills Peter. Gamora lets out one last anguished cry before what she hopes is her demise. It always isn't. The hellscape always makes her find a place in Thanos's prison, where Gamora knows she will spend the rest of her days before Thanos deems her loyal enough to be sent out to start the vicious cycle of killing she was in before she escaped. While these dreams seemed like the worst ones, they never were.

Other times Gamora would actually be the one to kill her entire team, like the monster she truly believed she was. Those dreams always started draped in the sheets of Peter's bed with a definitely naked Peter. Gamora always glanced at him before getting up. But after she got up she was no longer in control of her own body. Gamora always started by quietly walking away from the bed to put clothes on and get her sword, Godslayer. She killed the first person she saw all the way up to Nebula and Peter, sparing them for the most gruesome and painful of deaths. She was guaranteed to spot Nebula first, who always looked at her in these last moments with a look of sadness and acceptance. Nebula willing gave in to the verbal abuse and hatred that came out of the out of control monster, and when her death finally hit Nebula whispered 'I'm sorry' from her close to the dead body.

Murdering Peter in these dreams, well that was always the most heartbreaking. Gamora had killed the entire team before he awoke from the previous night's activities. She finds him in the kitchen, shirtless and humming along to one of the songs from his Zune. She quietly approaches, and Gamora just hopes for a quick death for Peter. But, of course, he turns around, sensing her. He winks at her and wraps his arms around her to slow dance. As they start dancing Gamora feels herself gaining control of her body once more. The guilt of murdering her own family posses her and she starts crying. Peter wipes the tears from her cheeks. It makes what she's about to do that much harder. She loses call control and quickly grabs the dagger from its spot in her shoe. She plunges it into his side. She regains control once more and looks at what she's done. A strangled cry escapes her lips. He starts violently coughing, and blood comes out of his mouth. It's too late, Gamora can't save him. She sits at his side and tries to comfort him. He whispers one last thing, "You're a monster." That final blow kills her. She has single-handedly ruined the thing she loves most, her family. As she cries alone in the Milano for her lost family Thanos appears. "My daughter, you have no need for these people, come back to me and live out your days with your real family." She's truly given no choice in whether she's going with him. And after she comes with him the dream ends.

Those visions she thinks are a curse. If she hadn't lied so horribly to Thanos, or if Peter actually killed her, she wouldn't be in this godforsaken place. But she understood why he didn't and she loves him even more for that weakness because that means he truly cared about her because if she was just another one of the whores he used to associate himself with, he would easily kill them. She loved him dearly now, and that motivated her to get out of the fucking void as soon as she could.


End file.
